Vignette #1: Gravity

This is the opening scene for a short story I am writing called Yinsen's Path. Let me know what you think in the comments!

Gravin stood at the top of the mountain, looking out over the sea of clouds just a few hundred feet below him. The sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon to his left, casting long shadows across the white before him.

He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, searching with his mind for the link between himself and the ground. It only took a moment to find, the strength of its inexorable pull causing it to shine bright like a sunbeam piercing the darkness of a cave. He could feel both ends of the link, one firmly attached to himself, the other affixed to the ground beneath him, each pulling the link taught like a bowstring.

Gravin gently plucked the link and felt it vibrate, his body becoming ever so slightly lighter and heavier with each oscillation. As the feeling faded, he reached out again, this time grabbing hold of the link, pulling on it with his mind. He felt himself grow lighter as he pulled, the link stretching and straining, until finally his feet left the ground and he began to float into the air.

Leaning forward and relaxing his pull on the link, Gravin began to inch slowly forward. He accelerated as his body tilted more and more, and soon he was gliding down the slope of the mountain like a bird, body parallel with the ground, arms outstretched. He quickly reached the shore of clouds that surrounded the mountain, plunging head first into their depths. He was instantly blinded, and would not have been able to tell he was moving were it not for the wind whispering in his ears.

After a few moments in the disorienting haze, Gravin broke through the clouds and found himself looking down a shear granite cliff. The massive slab of stone dropped thousands of feet straight down, meeting the ground half a mile inland from the seashore below. The face of the cliff was pristine, not a single ledge, crack, or outcropping marring its surface.

At the bottom of the cliff, Gravin could see his hometown of Firnesh, its elliptical central plaza extending out from the base of the cliff. A large fountain lay in the center of the plaza, its water as black as night due to the obsidian tiles that lined the pool. The fountain was a large circle, with four smaller semi-circles extending from its edge in each of the ordinal directions. Viewed from above the plaza looked like some kind of alien eye, the black fountain its unnatural pupil gazing at the sky.

Gravin dove as he flew over the edge of the cliff, following its immaculate face down towards his home. He swung left and right, tracing a winding path from side to side across the stone. He flew so close to the wall that his fingers sometimes briefly brushed its surface. His heart raced, not from fear, but from the freedom of flight filling him with happiness.

"Gravin!" shouted a familiar voice.

Startled by the voice mid turn, Gravin crashed into the cliff face, knocking the air from his lungs. Stunned by the impact, he felt the link slip suddenly from his grasp. His stomach lurched as gravity reclaimed its hold on him and he started to fall.

Wind screamed in his ears as he accelerated towards the ground, almost drowning out the sound of his own screams. He tried desperately to grab hold of the link again and again, but each time it slipped from his grasp like a greased bowstring. The link vibrated violently from his attempts, causing his stomach to churn as the grip of gravity fluctuated wildly. The plaza below grew as it raced up to meet him, the black waters of the fountain opening wide like the maw of some terrible beast ready to swallow him whole.

"Gravin!" the voice shouted again, just as he hit the water and darkness surrounded him.